hiya again.. okay,, the only reason im blogging right now is because im stuck at home.. yes.. STUCK AT HOME on NEW YEARS EVE.. so im freakin bored out of my mind.. gosh.. been in my room since 10pm last night(except for when nature calls) and still in my room since i am typing this out right now..

so.. wad have i been doing? nothing much.. gaming has practically lost its appeal and i spend most of my time idling around.. reading books or just plain slacking.. which reminds me.. need to wash my crumpler bag later.. dirty already haha..

okay so.. monday there was training.. a sad lot of people turned up.. only 9 of us at start.. 7 of us were left by lunch break cause 2 of them had to go off early.. so in the end the either day was very slack.. we started shooting at about 10am.. then we had a little commotion at the shooting ground..

hmm wondering what are they doing..

can you see? kanna caught by "chopsticks"? cannot see?

its a spider!!! eeek!!

okay its actually quite harmless.. but wen xuan was like screaming away whenever the spider was inched closer to her.. haha..
okay after that.. we continued shooting until it was lunch.. went to the famous RP's "smoking" corner to eat.. then went back.. however.. no mood to shoot so.. we went exploring instead.. you know the path behind the carpark where we always shoot? we decided to explore in there.. it would take too long to blog it out so.. heres our feature presentation!!note that everything is live and not acted out..

Starring: Nigel, Bjorn, Max, Zhi Mei and Me(as cameraman)

i know the quality is a little crappy.. but i only had my phone at that time so.. and it was a spur of the moment thing that i decided to record the video.. thats why it started in the middle instead of when we entered..

Life has been pretty harsh.. nothing seems to go right.. but i guess theres nothing i can realy do bout it.. so just live and let live..

Week has been pretty busy.. had 2 back to back christmas parties.. one on 24th one on the 25th.. the 25th was more like high tea but who cares haha..
so heres the high lights

24th December 2008:
The morning started pretty draggy.. Woke up early even though i slept at like 2 am the night before( over reasons i think you all should know).. went to the wet market with my mum.. no pictures about that unless of course you like see raw fish, meat and vegetables. So anyway.. bought breakfast and other stuff that was needed for the party and headed home.. it poured right after we reached home ( Thank God.. didnt have to get drenched ^^) and i slacked while my mum started on the preparation of the food.. I only came back to help once the raw food was nicely packed away.. my mum would shoo me away cause she felt i couldnt help haha.. oh well..

okay lets cut the boring details ya? once night fell, we( as in my family and neighbours) set up tables outside , in the corridor.. then laid the food.. i couldnt get any pics because everyone was so hungry that they dug in almost straight away.. so heres wad we had..

CHICKEN WINGS!!

fried rice, curry, bee hoon!!! and a lot of other stuff

not to forget dessert!! fruit jelly(agar-agar) durian puffs and eclairs!!!
well wads a christmas party without caroling? so wad did we do?

we passed out song sheets and starting caroling!! right there in the corridor.. didnt really matter since most of the neightbours were caroling with us as well =P

see?

we didnt use any speakers.. we used guitars!! my neighbour(the one in white) and his son( the one in black) playing ^^

after a while i got bored so went back home.. pondered a while.. then fell asleep..(quite late also.. around 1am bah)

25th December 2008:
CHRISTMAS DAY!! everyone woke up like super late.. too tired haha.. supposed to be at a fren's place at 1 pm.. woke up at 11am.. so imagine the rush.. managed to reach there at 1 30pm.. just to find out that everyone was also late haha.. essentially it was my mum's frens house.. its a bungalow.. so imagine a huge 2-storey house with a nice garden( a fairly big one too) and you got it ^^
so anyways we were invited over for lunch.. so here it is..

she actually baked an entire turkey for us to eat.. WOOOO

thats an entire lamb leg.. you can just imagine how rich she is now..
VOILA!! i dun think many of you knows wads this.. its an entire ham!!
not those kind that you see already sliced in the supermarket.. but the ham itself!!
okay you must be thinking.. "wad unhealthy people.. eating meat only.." please lor we very healthy de

see? got salad!! so we know how to balance it out.. actually got soup also.. but didnt take picture.. haha too nice to drink le..

now of course we got drinks.. i think you can see baileys, johnnie walker, absolute vodka peach.. but i am proud to say i didnt touch a single drop of liquor.. a bit scared of it already.. and also because of a personal reason( those who know, know; those who don't, don't bother ><)

ah.. so thats about it for the highlight.. still yet to get the pictures from the chalet from jia wei.. so lets leave that for another day..

well all i can say is that all is well right now.. only a few things still frustrate me.. namely.. someone.. and how i feel.. but i guess ill just take things as they come.. hopefully they will be for the better.. if not.. then.. i guess thats just my fate..

so ill try to update asap.. hopefully doesnt take as long as last time.. cannot procastinate.. in the words of my senior pastor, Pastor Rony Tan: " Do not leave things for tomorrow, you will fail to do it again tomorrow; do it NOW." Words of wisdom from today's sermon ^^ cya peeps

Nicholas, The Eternal Worrier, Signing Off

here am i again.. at a very unearthly hour.. okay its only 12.. damn tired but just felt like posting..
finally resolved the issue with my parents.. so im coming back to training!! I MISS MY BOW ='( and all my buddies.. dun care.. this saturday gonna shoot like siao.. only stop for lunch break.. cause need to eat lah..

well im sure you all can tell.. im definitely feeling better.. haven recovered from the sleepless nights.. but i dun think they were wasted.. really thought about a lot of stuff.. and i think im through a lot of things..

first things first.. would be wad to do right about now.. im just gonna do wad i feel like doing.. as much as i want to say i dun wanna please or live my life for anyone anymore.. a bit hard to do.. cause im just that kind of guy.. just wanna see people happy.. im not bragging.. people who really know me.. they know =P

next would be what to do about "that" aspect of life.. those who arent totally dense should understand.. i gotta stop thinking so much(its seriously killing me)..im just gonna take one thing at a time.. and see how it goes.. of course im not just gonna sit on the sidelines and hope to be noticed.. that just really stupid..ill keep trying.. gotta make sure she doesnt have a bad impression of me first.. then see how it goes from there.. so hopefully theres good news.. and doesnt turn out like the last time.. if it does( Please NO..) then i guess.. all i can do is wish her happiness..

so thats that.. hopefully theres no more bad news in my life.. but no one can truly tell so im just gotta keep going.. theres a christmas party tomorrow at my place.. hope its fun.. should be bah haha

these holidays were supposed to be for relaxing.. it was until that fateful night.. right after i realized how i felt.. its all been downhill after that night.. sleepless nights, being grounded..
guess holidays are both a blessing and a curse.. i dun have to go to school.. but yet i have so much time to think.. ah well..

okay need to sleep already.. tomorrow still have to help prepare for the party.. so cya peeps..

Nicholas, The Bleeding Romanticist, Signing Off

Is everything i do meant to turn out this way? I dunno how to live anymore.. no reason to go on.. i cant find any motivation to do anything.. and yet.. the only ray of hope i have.. is slowly diminishing away.. why?.. because i dun even know whether there is no chance for me at all.. why did i have to take those 7 shots.. 7 fatal shots.. and i think it practically screwed my life over..

I cant take this anymore.. sleepless nights.. trying to figure out whether you have a bad impression of me.. whether i still have a chance.. dazing around.. thinking.. being sucked into my inner world of sorrow.. I dun know how to let go.. because.. the more i try to avoid.. the harder it comes back to hit me.. everything is gray now.. almost as though my world has lost its colour..

I dunno what to do anymore.. what IS the right thing to do?.. ive quit smoking.. ive quit drinking.. but is that enough to change your impression of me? i dun wish to think anymore.. but.. it keeps coming back to haunt me.. like a never ending cycle of torment.. all im hoping.. is that you wont hate me.. and if possible.. give me a chance.. but.. i get the feeling its a chance that will never come..

Its monday.. and it comes with monday blues.. except its really blue for me.. went to watch a movie last night.. Ip Man.. it was pretty good.. martial arts.. then walked from Isetan Tower to Plaza Sing..

thats my mum with some korean dressup crew.. this is was taken outside wisma..

look at the lights.. pretty? wish they would light up my life.. taken outside centrepoint

orchard road packed to the max.... so many people.. like the many thoughts running through my mind right now..

sigh.. nothing else to talk about..

i dunno whether you will read this.. but i really am sorry for what happened that night.. i didnt wish for it to be like this.. please.. im really sorry.. hope you can forgive me.. and give me a chance.. i think you know how i feel.. if not.. its okay.. just dun ignore me..

Nicholas, Depressed Colourless Youth, Signing Off

its friday.. and im feeling blue.. and really really down.. just finished archery chalet.. regretted some actions of mine.. drank too much.. said things i shouldnt have said.. and now i feel so screwed.. and to make matters worse.. now my mum also went haywire.. she banned me from attending any of my archery trainings.. because of a stupid fine which i helped my friend to cover up.. her reason?? too many activities.. too much free time.. thats why have time to hang out with such people.. and because of this.. i cannot do my hobby?? its not fair.. its just not fair.. just when i wanted to make amends.. change someone's impression of me.. now all my chances are washed down the drain..
i just recovered from a bad spot in life.. and now im thrown into yet another twilight zone.. i seriously have no mood to do anything now.. one of the main reasons i liked going to school is because i have training.. i can do something which im passionate about.. i had finally found a hobby.. and now.. dun feel like saying anymore..

events that happened during the past week.. went to malaysia on saturday.. nothing much to say bought new clothes thats all..
monday went out of archery peeps to buy stuff for the chalet..
tuesday to thursday.. archery chalet.. probably both the best and the worse days of my life.. curse the alcohol..

thats it.. nothing else.. dun feel like writing anymore.. life for me has just lost its meaning..
im quitting drinking.. never gonna drink like a lunatic again.. im quitting smoking.. sorry class peeps.. but its something i feel i have to do.. and hopefully.. everything will turn out fine.. my mum will let me go back to trainings.. someone will not have a bad impressiosn of me.. so at least i hope i still have a chance..

Hello everyone.. i know its a little crazy.. im supposed to be sleeping now since im going to m'sia tomorrow for shopping.. cant wait =P

so anyways.. first a news update.. the 3 people in archery IG who were awarded the chance to upgrade are: Nigel, Elwin, Yi Jing.. congrats to them.. JIA YOU!! must train harder.. everyone must jia you!! ^^

So anways.. i downloaded photoscape the other day.. and im telling you.. its addictive man.. heres some that i made already.. its actually just a bunch of photos thrown together.. sorta like a montage.. but once i got the time ill do better ones..

Something made for myself.. haha..

this is currently my desktop wallpaper.. sorta like best moments of my life in RP

this is for the Pol-ITE archery team.. depicting the different teams..

and please.. just because im a guy and i like to edit photos means i have a disease called:
Distol
Uranium
Masticular
Bi
Acetone
Systonic
Shit

okay thats just me crapping stuff..
well ill come up with more when im free and find more pictures to edit.. okay thats about it.. im gonna crash.. tired haha.. may be after the chalet next week i got more material to play around with =P

im in class.. bored as hell.. oh well.. was damn tired yesterday.. so didnt have time..
Anyways.. yesterday being a holiday, followed my mum to do her christmas shopping again.. yes as a porter to carry stuff again.. went to IKEA first.. the one at tampines. the new one.. went to eat first.. then walked around IKEA.. saw a couple of things.. there was this cute polar bear.. my bro seemed attached to it.. and heres wad happened..

yes.. he started playing it with.. odd right?

and my mum.. nothing to say.. followed my bro and playing with stuffed things..

remember the polar bear? my bro put it in the shopping bag.. and it was sticking out!!.. man i must have looked like a weirdo..i have to admit though.. it was cute =)

didnt know why i missed this on sunday.. but when we went down to town and went into takashimaya i saw this christmas tree!! made entirely out of stuffed bears!!
later went to paragon to pick up some stuff that my mum bought before.. seriously everywhere is christmas spirit.. i keep hearing christmas carols until i wanna explode liao.. oh well..

Now i have a headache and my head is spinning.. dunno why.. oh well.. coming down with knowledge fever i guess.. too many things in my head..

Guess it is official.. nothing i can do about it except wait.. not that i mind though.. been waiting my entire life already.. so i guess i just gotta let it drift and see where to goes..

Okay gotta. go.. need to lie down a while.. so cya peeps.. until next time..

Nicholas, Can't think.. head spinning, Signing Off

Okay im just back from a whole day of shopping ( rather its my mum's shopping).. yes i follow her shopping just to help her carry stuff.. so nice of me right? =P

So anways.. today after church headed down to takashimaya and walked around a bit.. Saw a couple of cute stuff.. bought some then got bored and really hungry.. so headed towards tangs.. and went to this really good cafe.. Called The Island Cafe.. the food there is nice.. so are the drinks.. only catch is.. its pricey... so.. just ordered some food.. then decided to treat myself =)

Introducing the "Mojito" Fizz.. Milder Cousin of the Cuban "Mohito", It is a blend of Bacardi, Crushed Lime and Mint with Sprite.. Doesnt really packs much of a kick.. but tastes great.. those who want a taste.. tell me.. ill whip one up for ya =). i know how to make these things..
After that went around tangs.. or rather followed my mum around tangs.. then headed to paragon.. she bought quite a lot of things too..On my way to Plaza Sing heres the view of orchard road this year

then headed to Plaza Sing.. even plaza sing was in the festive mood.. too many coloured light already though.. blinding sia..

headed in to watch a show that my mum wanted to watch.. didnt even know the show existed.. Beast Stalker.. some Hong Kong flim.. quite interesting.. but a little retarded at the end.. oh well.. some things you just dun understand..

Kinda like my life.. so many "if i had done this.." or "it could have been like this.." blah blah blah.. kinda at a loss of wad to do and where to go next..

When you are undecided on what to do, things tend to go well
When you finally decide on something, things start to go awry
When the time comes that the decision has no meaning anymore,
you wonder, why must things always go haywire?
Is it so hard to realize a dream? Will a dream always remain a dream?
Is a wish too much to ask?

oh well.. im gonna crash.. very tired.. rambling already.. so.. cya peeps..

Nicholas, The Wishful Dreamer, Signing Off

hiya again.. its early morning.. not so early but still early for a sunday.. going to prepare to go church soon.. so this will be a pretty short post haha.. Up to now.. i still dunno what to do.. but i guess ill just let myself drift along for a while longer..

Saturday training was fun.. woke up and was greeted by clouds.. but not the raining kind.. sorta like those that will cover you from the sun.. so wasnt so bad..
Highlight of the training.. Bjorn SPLIT HIS ARROW!!! NOT ONCE!! BUT TWICE!!!

see where the nock split open? bingo

and thats how it looked like.. hilarious hahaha.. sorry bjorn.. its only 1 arrow =P

So anyways after training.. very few people.. dunno why a lot of them like just didnt come.. so left.. me,farhan,steph,winnie and minnie.. we went to buy kfc and headed to civic center to eat.. after that.. lepak over there and we were literally ROFLMAO.. kept telling jokes.. until buay tahan liao..

thats us still trying to eat..

dun be fooled by the mess we made... we cleared it up after that =P "Discipline Comes From Within"

Ah the crap i come up with..oh well.. okay gotta go.. if not later my mum gonna nag.. cya peeps..

Nicholas, The Unfortunate Straggler, Signing Off

Okay im here again.. and yes ill keep my promises.. i wont post all of em.. only the few i feel are nice =) although i must admit today's post will be long with full of pics


Heres our novice class archers.. dont think i say novice means they suck okay? they're good archers too ^^(From the left: Asraf, Jin Sheng, Jia Wei)

Okay our first standard class archers.. looks more like a buncha clowns.. oh well.. Presenting Male team 1 (From the Left: Nigel, Farhan, Simon)

Okay Standard Class Male Team 2.. Yes its my team.. kinda obvious.. duh.. haha.. the most serious of all the teams.. dunno why.. need to lighten up i guess haha(From the Left: Elwin,Bjorn,Nicholas(me))

Now.. Standard Class Female Team 1.. im not sexist.. but the compeition is gender based.. so ya.. anyway this team has a history of shooting each other arrows and landing in the exact same spot as the other members of this team.. Dubbed the "Asshole" team by seniors..(From the Left:Stephanie, Li Qing, Zhi Mei)

Finally.. Standard Class Female Team 2.. Essentially the Sorority Team of our club.. these 3 gals have been together since they joined the club.. and i doubt that will change..(From the Left: Si Seet, Yi Jing, Munirah)

This is essentially the bulk of our club.. Lively bunch dontcha think? especially the seniors.. dun think their all strict and fierce.. they sure know how to have fun =)

now.. try to guess whose the person farhan is trying to hide?? haha.. even during a competition we know how to have fun =)
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Okay thats it for the Pol-ITE pics.. ah yes.. remember the time i went to watch madagascar 2 with my classmates? heres some of the things we ( or rather they) did while we were slacking at ngee ann city plaza

okay this is before we watched the movie... was slacking at cine.. and obviously.. take picture lah.. if not damn boring..

that was until they took this pic.. damn candid sia.. i wasnt even paying attention.. watching the screen up on the ceiling..zzz not funny leh gals..

so anyways.. this was after the movie.. they literally went crazy.. and we didnt even have a drop of alchohol to drink.. seriously..



anyhow piggy bag each other.. sheesh.. we are in public you know?? okay sarah please remember your wearing a skirt >.<


muhahahaha punishment for acting so crazy.. nah j/k.. this was also a candid shot.. super random lor.. forgive the quality of the pictures.. it was dark.. so the focus was a little out =P anyways.. like i said had a lot of fun.. have to go out more often.. just wished.. perhaps... something might change.. nah.. cant do anything bout it..

So anyways.. my back hurts now.. training yesterday took its toll when we tried to push ourselves past our limits.. me and nigel literally pulled until our backs almost gave way.. then had to rest le.. too pain and too tired haha.. Life so far has been pretty decent.. with the exceptional down pits of life..

Well.. i guess im destined to be this way.. Living to put a smile on people's faces.. not such a bad thing i guess.. cause i just want people to be happy.. and ill be fine.. but.. what does it all mean?? Do i still have a chance? Or is it just giving me hope? so confused..

Well, when your confused.. the best way is to trust your instincts and move forward.. so i guess thats wad im going to do..
Well thats it.. better than the wordy posts right? cya peeps

Nicholas, The Confused Romantic, Signing Off

Finally got my hands on this song.. its from Clannad AfterStory.. really sad song.. yet it really highlights a huge part of my life.. heres the lyrics

Toki o Kizama Uta
Ochite iku sunadokei bakari miteru yo
Sakasama ni sureba hora mata hajimaru yo
Kizanda dake susumu jikan ni
Itsuka boku mo haireru kana

Kimi dake ga sugisatta saka no tochuu wa
Atataka na hidamari ga ikutsu mo dekiteta
Boku hitori ga koko de yasashii
Atatakasa o omoikaeshiteru

Kimi dake o kimi dake o
Suki de ita yo
Kaze de me ga nijinde
Tooku naru yo

Itsu made mo oboeteru
Nani mo ka mo kawatte mo
Hitotsu dake hitotsu dake
Arifureta mono da kedo
Misete yaru kagayaki ni michita sono hitotsu dake
Itsu made mo itsu made mo mamotte iku

Hadazamui hi ga tsuzuku mou haru na no ni
Mezamashidokei yori hayaku okita asa
Sanninbun no asa-gohan o tsukuru kimi ga
Soko ni tatte iru

Kimi dake ga kimi dake ga
Soba ni inai yo
Kinou made sugu soba de boku o miteta yo

Kimi dake o kimi dake o
Suki de ita yo
Kimi dake to kimi dake to
Utau uta da yo
Boku-tachi no boku-tachi no
Kizanda toki da yo
Katahou dake tsuzuku nante
Boku wa iya da yo

Itsu made mo oboeteru
Kono machi ga kawatte mo
Dore dake no kanashimi to deau koto ni natte mo
Misete yaru hontou wa tsuyokatta toki no koto
Saa iku yo arukidasu saka no michi o

A Song that Ticks Time Away
I’m only looking at the spilling hourglass
When I turn it upside-down, look, it starts up again
I wonder if I’ll be able to someday enter
The advancing time that only ticked away

Midway on the slope that only you passed through
Many warm spots of sunshine appeared
Here by myself, I’m reminiscing
About the tender warmth

It’s only you, it’s only you
Who I loved
My eyes tear up in the wind
And you become distant

I’ll remember forever
Even if just about everything changes
It was just one, it was just one
Ordinary thing
But in the brilliance that I’ll show you, there’s only one thing that was fulfilled
I’ll protect it forever and ever

The chilly days continue, even though it’s already spring
On a morning when I woke up earlier than the alarm clock
You’re standing there
Making breakfast for three

It’s only you, it’s only you
Who isn’t by my side
Up until yesterday, you were right by my side, looking at me

It’s only you, it’s only you
Who I loved
It’s a song that I sing
Only with you, only with you
It’s our, it’s our
Time passed together
I don’t want to
Continue on my own

I’ll remember forever
Even if this town changes
No matter how much sorrow I’m to encounter
I’ll show you when I was truly strong
C’mon, let’s go; we’ll start walking on the sloped road